Robocratic Free Press

Who is your secret?

Not your secret love, your secret friend, your secret pet; nothing so particular as those, but just your secret? A secret who. Someone you find yourself thinking of in the smallest lapse of concentration, both enjoying and despising every moment of it.

Think about it. You might be surprised.

Love is a tired symphony you hum when you’re awake.
Love is a crying baby mama warned you not to shake.
Love’s the best sensation hiding in the lion’s mane.

I used to wear a watch, a nice manly silver one with a blue dial and silver numbers. While I wore it, I felt the need to check the time constantly, to see how much of my day had passed already before the next morning came. I would synchronise it weekly in an effort of precision and prided myself on my timekeeping. Time became a sort of addiction; an obsession and compulsion that felt almost right, almost proper.

It began to feel tight, and rather than take it to the jeweller to lengthen the cuff size, I stopped wearing it entirely. I noticed my day was slower, that I drew enjoyment from every minute and savoured moments that seemed to last an eternity. Had I been wearing my watch I am sure I would have thought nothing of those moment, only a few seconds long; without it a clock seemed to teeter before ticking another second. Time was irrelevant, meaningless. J'ai senti libre.

Hello friends!

Those of you familiar with guitar class will be familiar with this assignment: I am looking for a song to teach to my class. I thought I had a few nice songs to teach but most of them, in retrospect (retraudition?), are composed of similar chords (mostly G, Cadd9, Em7, and variations of D and A). It must be an easy song, preferably just strumming but a small solo or bridge is alright provided it is easy enough to pick up in ten minutes. Barre chords are nice!

So far I have a couple Beatles songs rolling around in my head, as well as Boston and St. John’s by Great Big Sea. If someone has any other suggestions for a simple song, they would be greatly appreciated.

Of course, it should be in standard tuning and sans capo.

It was only a brief moment between the instant I saw it and the instant I felt it. Perhaps I felt it only because I had seen that white blur beforehand, and otherwise I would not have whizzing by that black Jeep. Perhaps, even, I both felt it and did not until the very moment my observations led me to conclude that I had indeed felt a small white ball, likely made of crumpled paper, hit me in the side

Normally I would not have given it much thought, perhaps it was litter thrown by the occupants of the black Jeep that, because of varying factors such as the velocity of the wind, my bicycle, and the Jeep; the temperature outside (a cool 20°C); or even what I was wearing that day that led to the impact of that small paper ball with my side. But that day I did: not in spite but bemused by the mentality of the man who had thrown it at me.

“Fuck you!” and some laughter drowned by the traffic was all I heard as the black Jeep continued its course on Cabana. I thought, for a second, that my life had just connected with two others, and this made me ignore the vulgarity of the men in the Jeep almost wholly.

Here’s to summer.

Relay for Life was pretty swell! My terrible, incoherent tired-writing ensues.

In track-speak, the athletes call a personal best a ‘PB’ —to break a personal best is ‘to PB’; I decided not to go home to maintain my functions and ended up staying over twenty-four hours at school (twenty-five). That is my proudest accomplishment (staying up all night and raving about bran muffins in that much-loved wee-hours-of-the-morning-exhaustion-induced-burst-of-energy is not so uncommon for me).

Immediately after school I was busy standing disciplined-like, waiting for some duty to be assigned to me regarding set-up. There was not much to be done, and I somehow managed to waste three hours doing very little. As it turns out, however, our tent was missing two pegs and we substituted them with a pen and pencil—surprising, both worked exceptionally well. If ideas were patentable I would own more than twenty dollars.

Eric gave me a fly beat and I suppose I was really into it, for I started my disgustingly sexy strip routine. Then I turned around to Beth right beside me! From nowhere, like a Viet Cong soldier. She will never forget that eyeful, I am quite sure of that.

I am the worst person ever! I was talking to Emily during the luminary ceremony but when it came to the end of the luminary lap, I mistook another girl for her and burped a loud, revolting man-burp into her face. I blame the darkness but really, inside I know I am a terrible person.

Unfortunately Mr Gatt was roxxxing out while I was on a Foods shift, but I managed to escape long enough to hear him cover Superman’s Song by the Crash Test Dummies, a Cash song, and Farewell to Clayoquot Sound by the Wyrd Sisters (which Kate requested). Janice and Beth were there as well so good times were had by all.

Beth and I hung out quite a bit and discussed a few things such as innocence, three boys, and mixed people. Walks make people every bit as sentimental as campfires, and make them feel almost as attached to one another (here campfires win out). I wish I’d met Beth earlier than only a few months ago. She is a nice girl.

Coffeehouse was pretty hot too—the best I’ve seen all year. I almost aced Hey There Delilah with Jack and Henry. Haha, I don’t think anyone heard us though because I didn’t have the mic low enough to pick up on my guitar. Aside from the usual Janice/Gertz and Basil/Johnny kickassing (I make it sound so trivial), there were a couple surprises too—Scott and Ms Demeter singing (the latter of which made me all the more smitten by her); Elliot, my favourite fly white guy; and Reg playing Soco Amaretto Lime. It was a little long though, interrupting my scheduled walk with Kate (because we desperately need to catch up). We only had about half an hour together before I had my second shift with Foods serving cold, day-old Timmy’s donations.

Suckers bought them muffins.

Boy:

Hey Andy can we put our bio project in your locker?

Andy:

No I’ve got a computer in there.

Annett:

So Natali did you learn anything?

Natali:

Yeah…

A moment passes;

Annett:

Haha, do you want to share what you learned?

Natali:

Yeah…

Another moment;

Annett:

Well, what?

Natali:

I don’t know!